February 2012
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Was going to apply for a job, remember that they...
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We live in this culture where everything is supposed to be so hip and so cool,...
– Andrew McMahon (via f0rbrighterdays)
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My dad used to say he would live to 100. Like surefire, no question about it.
I don’t see him living to 60 at this point.
That’s two years away.
And it scares the ever-loving shit out of me to the point where I become completely emotionally crippled thinking about it.
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Woman: Can I have birth control?
Government: No.
Woman: I got pregnant because I didn't have birth control and I don't want the fetus. Can I have an abortion?
Government: No.
Woman: I gave birth to my child but since I wasn't expecting it, I can't afford daycare. Can I have help paying for it?
Government: No.
Woman: Well, why can't I have birth control?
Government: Because. Sex isn't for recreation.
Woman: It can help regulate my period and benefit me in other ways.
Government: Too bad.
Man: For no reason other than for recreational sex, may I have birth control?
Government: Do you have a penis?
Man: YES, YES I DO!!
Government: WELL HOWDY, VALID CITIZEN. You can buy condoms by the dozens. Here, here's a pack of special condom for "His Pleasure." Oooh, these come in different colours and flavours. Here, try these. They have ribs on them. And this one glows in the dark!! LOL OMG DICK LIGHTSABER!!
Government: But seriously, you're a man. You can do what ever you want.
Woman: But-
Government: Shut up, you sinning, freeloading hussy.
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IT'S AVOCADO, YOU CUNT.
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Last year, the prestige movies were crowdpleasing enough to reach a...
– “The Artist” and the Oscars - NYTimes.com (via wonklife)
Sorry, I suppose it should’ve gone to Extremely Loud & Incredibly Close.
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Researching chemistry professors for next...
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preciousblueberries:
I don’t watch Jimmy Kimmel on a regular basis but I really respect what he does. He does some really great things some times. He was behind the Tom Hanks Toddlers and Tiaras thing. Can’t get much better than that.
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Somehow knocked over my alarm while sleeping and missed my exam
Called a racist that’s denying reality of an entire group of people
Haven’t heard from my dad despite being told he’d call me when he wakes up (which is usually around 6)
This day looks beautiful so far. I feel like Hitler in Germany.
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something about how time it owns us now: How the... →
wetbiscuitmcglee:
temporaryareas:
wetbiscuitmcglee:
Or “sexist?”
Or “homophobic?”
I think my real question is how is it that we’re supposedly maturing and advancing but becoming offended by anything more and more?
Sometimes a cigar is just a cigar, guys. Take a breath.
…
I’m sorry, Deanna, but there is not a single thing in this post that doesn’t contradict itself....
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It is 4am. How the fuck are you getting phone...
How the fuck has EVERYTHING become "racist?"
temporaryareas:
wetbiscuitmcglee:
Or “sexist?”
Or “homophobic?”
I think my real question is how is it that we’re supposedly maturing and advancing but becoming offended by anything more and more?
Sometimes a cigar is just a cigar, guys. Take a breath.
Please don’t take this the wrong way, but I really don’t appreciate a white woman telling me to “take a breath”. We’re maturing because...
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ludetwodudeswithfood asked: Jack Nicholson is one of those people like Tom Hanks and Meryl Streep who are better than oscars.
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English-speaker: Ooh, speak French to me baby.
French-speaker: Ta mere est une vache, et je foutais ta salope d'une soeur la nuit dernière.
English-speaker: Oh, you're such a romantic!
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Dad's okay.
He’ll be in the hospital until tomorrow night with an infection.
Sick and sore and on an IV and medication but fine.
I’ll be over here, angry at myself and bitter over that man’s immune system.
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How the fuck has EVERYTHING become "racist?"
Or “sexist?”
Or “homophobic?”
I think my real question is how is it that we’re supposedly maturing and advancing but becoming offended by anything more and more?
Sometimes a cigar is just a cigar, guys. Take a breath.
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Oh my god, one of my midterms was pushed back...
I’m so pleased. That’s 31 less pages of notes to review tonight.
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The only person that unfollowed me tonight
was someone that was also liveblogging the Oscars
…
what.
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